I’ve wanted to adopt my entire life. I can’t remember a time when I didn’t want to get involved with adoption, be it overseas or domestic. All I knew is that there were kids who didn’t have parents. After having my son, I realize now more than ever that I have enough room in my heart to love many children. So, the search began.
It wasn’t anything super intentional. I mean, how could it be? We didn’t make much money, I was a full time student, full time mom, and my husband was all of those things, plus he worked a full time job. We’re not on the streets, but we definitely don’t have a savings account. Due to our on irresponsibility, we live paycheck to paycheck.
These aren’t things that typically describe the family that is ready to begin the adoption journey at home, let alone internationally. But God usually doesn’t work with those who are ready. Look at Gideon, he wasn’t ready, but God called him to lead an army and defeat the enemy. Look at Noah; he was laughed at by everyone around him, but he did what God said and it worked out pretty well, I’d say.
That’s pretty much what happened with us. We weren’t looking to adopt, we weren’t expecting to adopt, and we certainly weren’t ready to adopt. I mean, we have a toddler at home. We need to get our lives together before we bring another kid into this chaos. But, like I said earlier, that’s not really how God works. About a year ago I happened upon Reece’s Rainbow. It’s a website dedicated to getting special needs children from overseas adopted. They had a Facebook group, and I joined. I knew I wanted to someday, it wouldn’t be until years from now, but I knew that someday I’d want to, and I’d be ready. I honestly laugh now that I think about it.
Not even a week ago I saw a picture of a beautiful child and I was instantly in love. I couldn’t shake the face of this gorgeous little one. I felt something deep down that said that I was supposed to bring this munchkin home. The next morning I showed Ian, my husband. Adoption is a normal conversation in our house. When I bring it up, he sits patiently and let’s me talk about my desire and how all these kids need us, only to reply, “We will soon. Not now, but soon.” But this time was different. I showed him the picture and told him of this little one’s story. I watched my husband break right in front of me. His heart fell into a million tiny pieces, and there was no turning back. We decided at that moment that it was time to figure it out. No more waiting until we were ready. This child has been ready for a home for years, and it was time to open our doors.
This has been the most stressful week of my life hands down. And it’s only been a week. I’ve gone over everything a million times. I’ve figured out how much money we need to raise, I’ve put together a basic timeline, and I figured out how to get our lives in check in order to give this munchkin a Christmas at home. Sadly, we’ve hit a major roadblock. We’ve basically been told that due to certain financial requirements, we are unable to continue.
I was heartbroken. I was crying my eyes out in my car for almost an hour. My husband was furiously researching what there was that we could do to get around it. We have yet to find out, but I know one thing: if we don’t bring this child home, it’s not going to be because we didn’t try. We would do all of this and more for our biological son, so I’m not going to give up on this one because he’s thousands of miles away.
I’m starting this blog to help chronical our journey. Where I have a place to whine, vent, complain. But I also want this to be an inspiration to those looking into adopting, whether it be domestic or overseas. I want to inspire you, encourage you, and tell you that even when everything is telling you that you can’t, there is always a way. I want even those seasoned adopters, who are struggling with their second, third, or fourth, or even just trying to manage those they’ve brought home. I want those mom’s that have no interest in adoption to be encouraged, to see why these kids need advocates.
But I’m also in it for the dads. It’s very easy to fall into the stereotype that it’s always the women that do these things. I have never seen my husband so passionate about something. Just over this past week, he’s been a better dad, he’s been a better husband, and he definitely found his purpose. I’m going to try to get him to come on here and post once in awhile. I want this to be for everyone at every stage of the process.
Adoption is hard, and all the red tape just plain sucks, but if the adoption community comes together, there’s nothing we can’t do.
His mission, our home.