I saw a post on one of the adoption Facebook pages that someone posted asking for a good blog post or article that explains why adoptive families feel like they have to fundraise.
I mean, come on, right? Only irresponsible people fundraise; you don’t try to adopt a child until you have all of your money ready, or else you aren’t a good parent. Or hey, adoption out of the United States is so much cheaper, and there are so many kids here that need to get adopted; you don’t care about the kids here if you choose to adopt outside of the country.
Anyone who has this line of thinking is so sadly mistaken. It is so sad that we’ve disassociated ourselves so terribly from the tragedies of the world that we’re only focus on us and our needs. You have to realize that we’re not trying to get a child home to fill some selfish desire. We’re doing what we can to help a global crisis.
The only thing that really matters is bringing these kids home. If you feel like more kids should be adopted from the US, then by all means go adopt one. No matter where the child is coming from, these kids are suffering. Whether or not they get the proper care isn’t the first thing you need to realize. Their parents had to, or chose to, leave them for one reason or another. That is such a hard concept to follow. Think about it: what would you do without your parents? Or what about those of you who have lost a parent? Would you really wish that upon somebody else?
Kids in these institutions, especially internationally, are neglected. They’re neglected and alone. They’re lucky if they’ve had someone cuddle them that day, let alone have someone tell them that they love them.
Before you start giving me excuses, I want to ask you something: how much is a child worth?
Just think about that for a second. Please, I would love to hear your answers. Terrible, terrible people sell kids cheaply on the streets. Other terrible people charge quite a bit because they see that they have value, even if it’s used for something disgusting and wrong.
Again, how much is a child worth? How much is your child worth? What would you do for your child? If someone took your son away and said that you could only have him back if you paid $35,000, would you say that it’s too much? Would you give up and just go back to your normal life while sitting comfortably in your chair? I truly hope you wouldn’t.
For those of us who have adopted, are adopting, or are trying so hard to get everything ready so we can adopt, we see that worth. I would go to the moon and back for my son. I would pull money from every resource possible, I would find money where there was none, I would go to the ends of the earth to bring my son home. That is exactly how we feel about these kids without families.
We’ve glanced over a myriad of pictures, or have been shown one that caught our eye.
And suddenly, the world stops. Something twists and burrows its way into your heart and you can’t stop staring. You realize that your child is in that picture, and you’re going to do whatever possible to bring them home. On that screen, or on that picture, is a child you’ve never met, but that you would do anything for. Thousands of dollars go from a mountain to a molehill. They’re just a means of getting that child home. You’ll rack your brain, cash in your savings, drop your pride and ask people to donate. You will do whatever you can to make sure that that child becomes your child.
You can’t put a price on a child. After doing the math, we’re going to have to raise about $30,000 to bring our child home, and that doesn’t even include getting our living situation figured out. $30,000 seemed like so much a month ago, but now that I’ve laid eyes on this little one, it’s nothing. Money is printed everyday, and I’m going to do whatever I need to in order to get it to where it needs to go.
If you don’t agree, then that is your right. It breaks my heart, but it is your right. You don’t have to give your money; you don’t have to give a bit of yourself so that a child has a family. It’s not your job. But as parents, it’s our job. We are doing everything we can to get our children in our arms. It’s our job to make sure that they’re safe, that they’re clothed and warm, and that they’re being fed. From here, we’re stuck. We can’t do any of that. We are parents who are unable to do our job, and it breaks our hearts. All we can do is raise the money as fast as we can, hoping that nothing terrible happens before we get there.
So if you don’t want to give, then that’s fine. But don’t you dare put down another parent for doing what he or she has to do in order to do their job.
For those of you that are waiting, hold on. Hold on for as long as you can because the fact that you continue your fight means that you’re doing your job. You are doing what you can to give a child a home. Don’t let anyone try to demean that or take that away from you. I dream of the day that I get to hold my child, and I dream of the day that you get to hold yours. Keep fighting, keep praying, because in the end, that’s our job. To not give up on our kids; to show them that anything is possible when you push your doubts to the side and dive in.
Keep going; I’m cheering for you.
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